This week, everything has been put on hold.

I can honestly say I have never felt this miserable since... that week that I went to EFY with friends and picked up a virus on the last day and went home to be bed ridden for 2 days.

That was forever ago!

The whole first trimester of this pregnancy I can probably count on one hand the number of times I got sick.

It was hard, but not enough to take me out of work and classes for very long.

Probably the worst was the hormones.

Anyone that has been through it knows exactly what I'm talking about.

You know that when you have tears running down your face after you snap your hair tie trying to put your hair in a pony tail, or when the happiest moment of your week is when you find chicken biscuit crackers in the cupboard..

Something is a little off.

Jon was so understanding!

99 % of the time:)

I'll never forget this one day, that 1 %, I was about 11 weeks, and I started crying for who even knows why...

Jon just started laughing so hard.

Obviously that made me laugh.

But I still couldn't figure out why I was crying.

So we can all pretend that pregnancy is just all butterflies and happy moments while you dream about what the future will be like with your kid and how awesome he/she will be etc. etc.

And there are great moments, just don't feel bad when it's not all great.

This week I got incredibly sick.

I think it started on Saturday, when I went to the pool to work out.

I felt a little off the next day, and Monday I had the flu.

I couldn't take any chemical medications for fear it would harm the baby.

This persisted for 4 days.

I had to use nothing but warm water with honey and lemon juice to soothe my aching throat, while I used up probably 2 rolls of toilet paper and ate soup for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Now that I'm feeling a little better, I can look back and say that even though it was some of the worst pain I've experienced, the experiences are some I'll never forget.

I slept very little for 2 or 3 days. I remember one of those nights, I went out in the kitchen to make a warm drink. It was 3 AM, and I was SO tired but unable to sleep.

I went and laid on the couch so my coughing didn't wake Jon, he had waken up for me so many times in the past few nights and I wanted him to sleep.

As I laid there, I was surprised at how happy I still felt.

I was in so much pain, but it didn't seem to matter.

I thought about how the pain and sacrifice I felt only made me love this baby more.

I thought about how I fell in love with Jon all over again as I watched him care for me in a way no one ever had.

He was constantly bringing me everything making sure my bed was warm when I had the chills, and cooling me off when I had a fever.

He talked to me about anything just so I could get my mind off the pain.

He made me laugh when all I wanted to do was cry.

He gave me confidence even when the future seemed hopeless.

He even went to a restaurant with me that he vowed he would never spend money on: